Funny Birthday Phrases

If someone special in your life has a birthday coming up, why not celebrate the occasion with the gift of laughter? Funny birthday phrases aren't in short supply - when it comes to aging, there's always something to joke about.

This year, greet the guest of honor with banners displaying funny birthday phrases and quotes such as:

  • If I'd known I was going to live this long, I'd have taken better care of myself. - Eubie Blake
  • Few women admit their age. Few men act theirs.
  • Birthdays are nature's way of telling us to eat more cake.
  • Old age isn't so bad when you consider the alternative.
  • In dog years, I'm dead.
  • Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
  • You're not 40, you're 18 with 22 years experience.
  • You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake. - Bob Hope
  • As you get older, three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two. - Sir Norman Wisdom
  • Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest. - Larry Lorenzoni
  • People ask me what I'd most appreciate getting for my eighty-seventh birthday. I tell them, a paternity suit. - George Burns
  • There is still no cure for the common birthday. - John Glen
  • When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it happened or not. - Mark Twain
  • Inside every older person is a younger person, wondering what the heck happened. - Cora Harvey Armstrong
  • A stockbroker urged me to buy a stock that would triple its value every year. I told him, At my age, I don't even buy green bananas. - Claude D. Pepper
  • I wake up every morning at nine and grab for the morning paper. Then I look at the obituary page. If my name is not on it, I get up. - Harry Hershfield

Birthdays are a great opportunity to have a few laughs and to embrace the celebrant's coming of age - regardless of the age they're celebrating. This year, enjoy sharing the gift of humor with the special birthday honoree in your life with these funny birthday phrases.