Funny Birthday Phrases

Funny Birthday Phrases - If someone special in your life has a birthday coming up, why not celebrate the occasion with the gift of laughter? Funny birthday phrases aren't in short supply - when it comes to aging, there's always something to joke about.

• If I'd known I was going to live this long, I'd have taken better care of myself. - Eubie Blake
  
• Few women admit their age. Few men act theirs.
  
• Birthdays are nature's way of telling us to eat more cake.
  
• Old age isn't so bad when you consider the alternative.
  
• In dog years, I'm dead.
  
• Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
  
• You're not 40, you're 18 with 22 years experience.
  
• You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake. - Bob Hope
  
• As you get older, three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two. - Sir Norman Wisdom
  
• Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest. - Larry Lorenzoni
  
• People ask me what I'd most appreciate getting for my eighty-seventh birthday. I tell them, a paternity suit. - George Burns
  
• There is still no cure for the common birthday. - John Glen
  
• When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it happened or not. - Mark Twain
  
• Inside every older person is a younger person, wondering what the heck happened. - Cora Harvey Armstrong
  
• A stockbroker urged me to buy a stock that would triple its value every year. I told him, At my age, I don't even buy green bananas. - Claude D. Pepper
  
• I wake up every morning at nine and grab for the morning paper. Then I look at the obituary page. If my name is not on it, I get up. - Harry Hershfield